When it comes to the big day, I’ve always wondered hmm, who should I invite? Well, after much though, I realized I wanted to invite quite a bit of family and friends when my time came, but honestly it was tough to decide. If you’re struggling like I did, read on; I’ve got some tips to think about.
So let’s use my decision process as an example. Originally, the party girl in me wanted at LEAST 150-200 guests (turn up), but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve begun to think a huge wedding just isn’t for me. After countless discussions with my cousin about plans for our future during marathons of “Say Yes To The Dress,” I’ve found a few things to think about to narrow down my guest list.
Are Any of the People You Are Choosing Close Family or Friends?
I have a large family of many cousins and close family friends between both of my parents, but are they close to me and do I find them to be significant figures in my life? I found myself realizing that I don’t talk to many of my family members that often, and if I do, it’s only because I see them once or twice in public or at a family reunion. So what’s the point of inviting them to my ceremony if we don’t speak daily or even weekly? It may sound harsh, but I think that if the family or friends that you are inviting have significantly been present in your life then they are the ones who truly deserve an invite to your wedding. Also, if others get hurt you didn’t invite them… that’s not your problem. I feel that no one should feel obligated to invite someone to their wedding just because they are related or have made an appearance in their life once or twice. Think of your wedding invite as a privilege rather than a right. And if the person begins to bother you for an invite? Chances are they weren’t worth inviting in the first place.
Do Any of the People Support You or Your S/O?
Another thing worth taking into consideration is support. Do any of the people I want to invite support me or my future S/O? Do they support our union and want us to be happy? I know, I know, there may be people that don’t support you or your S/O and keep it quiet… we get that. But if you know how they truly feel, do you want that energy at your wedding? To me, I think that if they can’t support our relationship then what’s the point of that person even being there? Free food? Not on my dime. They may seem supportive of you or your S/O considering they are taking the time to come should you decide to invite them, but they aren’t supportive of the relationship and that’s honestly what the wedding is about. I think the person should support both people as individuals and as a couple in order to deserve an invite. That bad energy is for the birds.
Can Any of the People Provide Helpful Advice?
Lastly, I’d consider if the individual I am thinking of inviting can provide positive and helpful advice during hard times. Instead of just saying whatever useless idea pops in their minds first, I think the people at your wedding should be able to help you or your future spouse with any problems that come your way. For example, say I’m having a hard time communicating a problem with my partner. Instead of “Just talk to them,” I’m gonna need an example on how I can start the conversation. Anybody can give advice, but not everybody can give good advice. Wise guests are a must-have at a wedding and will be beneficial for any couple in the distant future.
Share your opinions for inviting guests in the comments below!